An Epic Tale Also
by TexasCoverGirl
Summary: jacobs brothers, star wars, harry potter, twilight, narnia...what more could you want? all thrown into a comic situation.


Megan, Jessica, Kara

It was the best of times and the even bester of times. Kara, Megan and Jessica were having a video chat at two in the morning of the same night that "A Little Bit Longer" the Jacobs Brother's new CD was released. Megan was gushing about how attractive Nelson looked in his yellow capris when a random message appeared on Jessica's screen.

"OMG guys!" she said, leaning closer to the screen. "It says it's a contest to meet the Jacobs Brothers!"

"OMG! You should totally enter all of us!" Megan said.

Jessica squealed as she submitted the contest form. "I hole we win!"

Kara rolled her eyes. "I can't believe that you actually entered us in that. And I can't believe I'm stuck talking to you guys while Elizabeth is at Hogwarts in Scotland."

Megan stuck her tongue out at the fact that Elizabeth was in Hogwarts and Megan herself had never received a letter. She had however, received a letter from the IRS saying that her taxes were overdue and her baby sitting business was being audited. Jessica screamed, scaring everyone, including Ellie, Elizabeth, who had just popped up on video chat.

"What was that for?" Ellie demanded, covering her ears.

"OMG OMG OMG!!" she howled. "WE WON!"

"How?" Kara wondered. "We entered only five minutes ago."

Ellie sNickered. Kara scowled at her. "You," she said.

"Me," El responded.

Jessica looked confused, but that was a common expression for her, so it surprised no one.

"My sister rigged the competition," Megan told her patiently.

"Well my sister," she started emphatically. "Um…my sister…went to college," she trailed off.

Kara raised an eyebrow. "I'm at college too."

"So when are we meeting them?" Megan asked, directing her attention to Jessica.

Jessica seemed taken off guard by the sudden turn of attention in her direction. "What?" she wondered.

"When do we meet the Jacobs Brothers?" Kara answered, enunciating slowly.

"Tomorrow," she answered. "At noon, at the SBC center before their big concert."

"But I have a dentist appointment tomorrow!" Megan cried in despair.

"Not anymore," Ellie answered. "It's next week on Wednesday."

"That's why we sent you," Megan trilled.

Ellie looked nonplussed. Her lips began to move almost undetectably.

"Ellie!" Kara snapped. "I warned you not to do that. Your mom is going to kill you if Megan grows alligator skin again."

Ellie stared at Kara for a moment and then logged off, but not before sending Kara a message telling her what she should wear the next day. Kara sighed at her sooth-seeing, aging, vampire, werewolf, witch, human best friend. She grinned as she remembered meeting Ellie's parents the first time. She couldn't believe that Reneesme and Jacob were meant to be together.

Megan once again looked unhappy.

"What's wrong?" Jessica asked.

"Oh nothing," Megan replied. "My sister is showing off again."

"Your birthday is tomorrow, isn't it?" Kara asked.

Megan nodded. Even though she was turning fifteen, she was really only about four and half years old. She had inherited her mother's creepy super aging gene, which meant that she would be fully grown by age seven and would remain young for many, many, many, ever.

Megan smiled. "This is going to be the best present ever!!"

_Maybe, _Megan added in a text message to Kara. _But forever hasn't come yet._

The next day arrived, well, it had already arrived, but ten in the morning approached quickly and Kara woke up feeling refreshed. She went downstairs, scratching her head and rubbing sleep out of her eyes only to find Jessica and Megan sitting at her kitchen table, fully dressed and raring to go.

Kara hadn't reached the bottom step before turning around and going back upstairs. She took a long, hot shower and stepped into her room to get dressed. She pulled open her armoire and shivered as snow whooshed out from Narnia.

She let a cuss word slip as a goat bottomed man approached through her clothing. Without waiting for him to speak, she shut the door and slid the deadbolt into place. Nothing was more unwelcome in the morning than a faun catching you naked as you dressed.

She ignored the incessant knocking and the cries for help as she pulled on a pair of worn jeans and a Baylor t-shirt. She undid the deadbolt, but didn't open the door as she left the room. Her hair was a nuisance, so she pulled it up in a pony tail and left it.

Megan almost creamed Kara as she came back into the kitchen. She grabbed Kara's arm, motioned for Jessica to follow and yanked her back up the stairs to where the faun stood in her doorway.

Jessica petted the animal that stood just over four feet, much to the animal's displeasure.

"Cute goat," she said, ushering it out of the doorway and shutting the door.

Megan already had Kara in her underwear and was holding clothing up to her, trying to figure out what purple shirt Ellie had mentioned that Kara should wear.

"Shut the portal," Kara whined, shivering as more snow whipped through the doorway.

Jessica shut the door to Narnia and looked at them. "I still don't know why you call your armoire a portal," she muttered.

After a few more moments, Megan dressed Kara in the same jeans she was wearing and a purple blouse. She handed Kara a pair of heels and Kara threw them back at her. Jessica caught them in her mouth, resorting to her baser, more wolf-like instincts. Leah Clearwater and Draco Malfoy, receding hairline and all had fallen madly in love several years back, resulting in the strange, werewolf, squib that made up Jessica. Unfortunately, she had inherited, in a staggering amount, her mother's obtuseness.

Finally eleven thirty rolled around, and they all piled into Kara's truck. Somewhere along the way, Ellie appeared in the backseat. The snap of her apparition, didn't surprise Kara but sent Jessica into a frenzy. Granted, Ellie did land on her lap.

They arrived a few minutes late, due to Kara's lack of directional skill and Ellie's faulty map; the marauder's map didn't include downtown San Antonio.

"Well at least I know Hermione is keeping her dirty paws off Oliver Wood," Ellie said, as if it was consolation for giving her false directions.

"Hermione is still fawning over that dumb Ron Weasley," a voice said from Ellie's pocket.

Kara pulled into the parking lot and everyone disembarked. The Jacobs Brothers stood slouched against their bus. Big Tim had just scared away a gaggle of giggling girls that all looked to be their younger brother's age. Megan almost fainted when she saw that Nelson was wearing a pair of yellow capris and a blue and white striped polo. Jacob dressed in jeans that he had stolen off a fifth grader and a long sleeve collared shirt with a skinny tie. Kaleb looked relaxed in his ascot, vest, jeans and top hat.

Nelson swaggered over to where Megan stood. He took her hand, kissed it and murmured, "Hello, beautiful."

She blushed deeply and found herself staring at her shoes. He followed her gaze. "Cute shoes," he told her.

She smiled. She had on cute wedge sandals that were a light blue and matched her cute top.

Jessica screamed, piercing the eardrums of every dog in the Alamo city area. She threw herself out of the vehicle and was approaching Mach Three as she neared Jacob. Jacob looked up, his face stricken with terror, when Jessica suddenly and instantly came to a halt, her face pressed up against an invisible wall. Ellie climbed out of the truck, smiling vindictively.

Kara pushed off from the truck and studied where Kaleb was laughing at his brothers. She was about to head over to where he was when Megan grabbed her.

"You don't have a license to marry people do you?" she whispered.

Kara sighed, rolled her eyes and walked around the wall that Jessica was still trying to get through. Jacob approached her and waggled his eyebrows.

"Hey there," he said.

Jessica let out a wail of desperation and flung herself against the invisible wall again.

"You're no Martin Paulson," she told him and kept walking till she arrived at Kaleb.

"What's wrong with your friend?" Kaleb wondered.

"She's working on her mime in a box," Kara told him, following his gaze over to where she was beating herself even less senseless.

"Ellie, let Jessica go," Kara called. "She's got limited amount of brain cells and she's resorted to killing the ones that she needs for basic function."

Ellie shook her head sadly but released her from the spell. Jacob was immediately overcome by Jessica, a force five hurricane of girly giggles and senseless admiration. He called desperately for Big Tim, but Big Tim was on his typical five minute break.

"Sorry, buddy," he called. "I'll be back in three and half minutes."

Jacob didn't look like he'd survive three and half minutes.

Jessica had her hands in his hair, her nose to his neck and her legs wrapped around his waist. She needed no assistance in holding herself up; her attraction was enough.

"You smell wonderful," she said dreamily.

Jacob's face shifted into that of wariness. "Uh, thanks?"

Nelson and Megan walked over, his hand and hers stuck together like they had been born that way.

"Jacob?" Nelson asked, his voice low. "Where is the nail polish remover?"

Jacob shrugged. Nelson repeated the question to Kaleb.

"Back of the bus," he told Nelson.

Nelson and Megan ventured into the bus, not letting each other go once.

"What was that about?" Kara asked, nodding towards the bus.

Kaleb shrugged. "Jacob stuck rubber cement in Nelson's pocket as a joke. Ten to one their hands are stuck together."

Ellie was sNickering again. "That wasn't just rubber cement, that was definitely a spell," she answered. "One that I invented."

Kara couldn't help but laugh. "Then you don't have a reversal for it?"

"Nope," she said, completely at ease.

This time Kaleb and Jacob laughed too, but Jacob's laugh was cut short by Jessica's mouth. You could hear his stifled scream for help. Big Tim tossed his coke can in the garbage and sauntered over to where Jacob had his Jessica growth. Big Tim reached down and clocked Jessica on the head. She fell unconscious immediately. Big Tim scooped her up and no sooner had Jacob been freed then he had attached himself to Kara.

Kara heard Ellie mumbling and spun around, but it was too late. Jacob was now permanently affixed to Kara's side. Jacob sighed happily. Kara launched herself and Jacob at Ellie, but she sidestepped the attack, told Kara she was welcome and moved on to find out whether Megan and Nelson had realized that they were stuck.

Kara let a string of words unsuitable for pleasant conversation trail through her head before settling on her favorite swear word. "Son of a banshee."

Jacob cocked his head in confusion, and leaned closer to her face, but she pulled away and luckily she could lean far enough away that his lips couldn't reach her. She dragged his love limp body up the stairs of the bus with Kaleb trailing along behind. She could hear his roaring laughter from over Jacob's pleading with her to marry him.

The bus was suddenly crowded from Oliver's arrival through a window of the bus. He tossed his broom back out the shattered window and turned furiously to Ellie.

"What are you doing here!?" he roared.

Kara reached over and slapped him. "Get a grip," she told him.

He turned to Kara but suddenly seemed deflated. The wrestling match that they had had a year ago must have still burned fresh in his mind. Kara had challenged Oliver to a wrestling match, to which he readily agreed, but soon tried to back out of when he realized that she was that daughter of Storm and Wolverine. It was a good thing Madame Pomfery was standing by because the slash marks in his back wouldn't have healed otherwise. Now she flexed her free arm and pulled her lips back over her teeth. He backed up and behind Ellie.

Kaleb chuckled from his seat in the corner of the bus.

"You scared the pants off him," he laughed.

Jessica chose that moment to come back around. Big Tim handed her a Budwiser.

"Always works for me after fainting spells," he told her. "Helps starve off the hangover."

Megan yanked the beer out of Jessica's hand and tossed it out the window too.

"You don't need that!"

Nelson was still holding her hand and he seemed content to let her lead him wherever she wanted. He smiled dreamily at her as she chastised Big Tim for his poor judgment. Big Tim sat down, almost on top of where Oliver sat now. Kara turned to Jacob.

"We need to fix this."

She dragged him back out of the bus and grabbed his hand. She looked deep into his eyes, trying to find something romantic to tell him that she could squeeze out without vomiting.

"Oh, Jacob," was as far as she got before she groaned inwardly and kissed him hard.

There was a loud popping sound and they were suddenly two entities again.

He looked sad. "Well, that's better I guess. But how did you know how to solve it?"

"I know Ellie," she told him.

He seemed to accept the answer. His face fell a bit more as he turned away.

"Jacob?" she said.

He turned and she kissed him one more time; this time with a little bit of affection.

"You're a sweet guy, but I'm not your princess," Kara told him.

He smiled happily as Nelson and Megan came out of the bus. They stared at each other in a sickeningly sweet way that made Kara's teeth hurt and her stomach threaten to revoke her lunch. They sat down on the pavement, completely unaware of everyone else, and continued their conversation. Nelson's eyes focused solely on her and her eyes darting between his and the ground, a pink flush a constant tint to her skin. Kara made a gagging sound and turned back towards the bus, bumping into Kaleb.

Kaleb grabbed her shoulders to steady her from falling over. Curse Megan and the stupid heels, she thought as she reached down and took them off. She pitched one at Megan, but it bounced off Nelson instead. She pitched the other one and this time hit her mark. Neither noticed, but they inclined their heads more towards each other as if telling secrets. Kara heard her giggle. Kaleb gagged. She fell.

Her eyes glazed over as Kaleb continued to laugh at his younger brother. It was the most glorious sound she had ever heard. Kaleb noticed her glassy eyed stare and looked at her slightly confused. He tapped her shoulder and she snapped out of it.

"Sorry," she blushed.

He looked a little more confused.

"You're cute when you're confused," she told him.

He ran a hand through his curly locks and looked at the ground, unsure of what to do in such a situation. It was so rare for a girl to take an interest in him other than to use him to get to his brothers, or in one girl's case, his bodyguard. Amber was a loon; it was a fact determined by the San Francisco Home for the Criminally Insane. She was outpatient at the time, but after that stunt, which scarred Large Jacob for life and forced him into early retirement, she because a permanent resident.

Kara pulled him out of his reverie. She touched his face, running her fingers down his sideburns and ascot before Oliver and Ellie tumbled out of the bus. Her face was flushed and so was his. They both looked slightly disheveled and surprised. Big Tim appeared over them.

"Get a room," he told them.

Jessica was tossed out after them, and she landed in Jacob's arms. She fainted. Jacob smiled.

"I love being me," he said.

Jessica came to again. "I love you too," she murmured.

He kissed her lightly. She passed out again.

Kara shoved them both out of the way to look at Kaleb again. This time her view was marred by Ellie and Oliver and their tonsil hockey. Kara frowned and leapt easily over them, landing in the position that Jessica first had with Jacob, only with this time with Kaleb.

"Hi," she said, her voice trailing off.

He smiled. "Hi."

A rock, more the size of a boulder came flying out of nowhere. Kara saw it first, hopped off Kaleb and grabbed it before it collided with Megan. She set the boulder down and gazed into the distance, noticing a figure moving faster than any human ever should. As the girl drew closer, her crimson eyes became apparent and her pale skin gave her away.

"Megan," she hissed. "You're mine."

Megan finally looked up to where Malorie Disaster "Heather Rope Tether" Hole "Future Mrs. Nelson Jacobs" Cyprus, stood fuming over her; if blood sucking, soul crushing, vampires could fume from their icy skin.

Megan stood up, her razor sharp teeth beginning to show. Her hand was still attached to Nelson though. Kara moved closer to the action. Kaleb trailed behind, a light smile on his face. Kara could see Megan tensing, her half vampire, half werewolf self just yearning to rip out her competitors throat, but not able to because the man that she had imprinted on and the man that had imprinted on her, was still attached to her.

"Kiss him," Kaleb told her. "You'll be good to go."

Megan turned toward him. "What?" she snarled.

Kaleb rolled his eyes, grabbed his brother by the back of the shirt and shoved him in front of Megan.

"Kiss her," he demanded.

"But dude!" he stuttered. "I wanted it to be roma-"

His mouth opening on the "a" sound gave Kaleb an opening. He shoved him forward and Nelson's lips found hers; for a brief moment, all time stopped. When it finally started again, thanks in large part to Ellie pulling herself from Oliver's lips for a moment and setting the clock in motion again, Megan's hand and Nelson's hand fell apart.

Nelson stared slack jawed at his brother's sudden knowledge of all things magical and then at his love, who was preparing to take on the dreaded ex-girlfriend, beast from the underworld.

Malorie growled, crouching into a feline-esque position, as if ready to spring. Megan readied herself and suddenly they were in the air. Megan spun, stretching her teeth out and ripping one of Malorie's arms off. Malorie cried out in pain, her green alien goo going everywhere. It splattered across Oliver and Ellie and Ellie spun around angry.

"Keep it contained!" she hollered.

Kara found herself in a protective stance in front of Kaleb. Ellie pulled away from Oliver, running a hand through her hair, and venturing over to where the beat-down was going on.

"I've got ten on Malorie," Kaleb said. Kara glared at him.

"Ten on Megan," Kara replied.

"Ten on Malorie," Nelson said.

Megan rounded on him. "WHAT!?"

Nelson shrugged sheepishly. "You know I lo- care for you, but I've seen Malorie make mince meat of lots of girls I've liked."

Megan turned her attention back to where Malorie was growing another arm.

"What's up with Nelson and his attraction to girls with 'M's at the beginning of their names?" Jacob asked, still holding Jessica.

"Ten on Megan," Jessica told him.

The sound of bodies colliding made everyone jump. Megan and Malorie continued their epic battle over a boy and finally there was a loud snapping sound and Malorie's head flew across the parking lot. Kaleb jogged over and wrapped his ascot around Malorie's head and carried back over to where the rest of the group was waiting. Jessica and Jacob had their jaws hanging open and their eyes wide.

"What?" Megan asked. "You've never seen someone kill a vampire alien?"

"No," Jacob answered. "It's just that I've never seen someone do it over Nelson – out o f all people. Why not me?"

"Because you've got me," Jessica answered, ignoring his longing stare at Kara.

Kara stuck her tongue out at him.

Kaleb then pulled out a lighter and butane fuel from his top hat. They lit Malorie's body and a plume of dark orange smoke came from it, along with a smell that made babies cry. When Kara looked up, Jacob was crying.

"Jacob?" Jessica asked slowly as she climbed out of his arms.

"Jacob's only five years old technically," Kaleb told them. "He's a werewolf human baby."

Jessica let him lie on the pavement and cry into her lap. She stroked his hair as he heaved sobs, waiting for the Malorie cloud to disappear. When it finally did, he was able to pull himself together.

"Sorry about that," he muttered.

"Looks like I'm the bigger man now," Nelson told him.

"NO!" Jacob screamed. "I'm Jacob Jacobs, I'm the boy who lived, I'm the big man in this group, I'm top dog, I'm Jacob Jacobs!! Nobody can have more testosterone than me!!"

Nelson rolled his eyes and side stepped the "pituitarius – shrinkidinkius" curse. He'd been hit one too many times with it and had finally reached the point where he could see it coming a mile away.

"What's going on here?" a black haired boy with green eyes asked.

Harry continued over to where Oliver and Ellie stood, discussing the magical properties of the blast ended skank.

"What the jiggery pokery!?" Harry demanded.

Oliver shrugged.

"You steal the girl that I liked, kick me off the Quidditch team, and then locked me in the chamber of secrets, knowing that I could not speak snake!"

"That's because you sucked as a seeker, never made a move, and posed in front of everyone, claiming that you could speak snake; when I was the one who could really speak parseltongue."

Harry looked utterly deflated. Ellie gave Harry the look she had given him many times at Hogwarts; it was the "you-are-dumb-and-I-don't-like-you" look. Oliver laughed at her expression and then kissed her again.

Kara turned to Nelson and Megan.

"That was really hot," Nelson told Megan. "I don't think I'll ever find anyone like you, ever again. Go get my guitar so that I can write a song about you."

Megan nodded and pulled a wand out of her back pocket. "Accio guitar."

Nelson's jaw hung open and he grinned. "Wow."

"So why didn't you get a letter from Hogwarts?" Kara asked.

"I burned it. Why should I go to Hogwarts? Especially since I age so rapidly anyway. Plus, I like getting on Ellie's nerves when she tries to show off."

The guitar came flying out of the bus, with a Big Tim attached.

Nelson took the guitar from him and sat down, playing a set of chords that made Megan start to melt. Megan took a seat next to him and rested her head on his shoulder as he continued to play.

Big Tim stood over the scene, taking in the sight. He let out a raucous laugh as he studied the situation. Megan and Nelson, contentedly on the pavement outside the bus; Oliver and Ellie, tonsil hockey their game again; Jessica and Jacob were starting a game of pitching pennies at each other; and finally Kara and Kaleb, engrossed in a discussion over whether it would be too noticeable to sprinkle Malorie's purple remains in the garden in front of the SBC center. Harry had picked his broom up from where he had dumped it on the ground and kicked off, his broom carrying him up into the clouds and out of sight.

He clapped his hands a few times. "Come on guys!" he called. "You have a meeting with your manager before practice begins!"

Kaleb, Nelson and Jacob exchanged glances and shook their heads.

"You don't like your manager?" Jessica asked, catching subtlety for the first time in her life.

Kara laughed at her. "Maybe we should let you and Jacob spend more time together."

Jessica and Jacob beamed at the proposition. Nelson interrupted the happy scene with the reminder that they had to meet with their manager. Kaleb groaned and motioned for everyone to head towards the building in the distance.

"What don't you like?" Megan asked, studying Nelson's handsome features as they walked hand in hand towards the front doors.

"Well," Nelson said. "He's quite militaristic; drives us to work, work, work, all the time. He wants us to take up a work-out regime, complete with sword practice."

"Ridiculous," Kaleb muttered.

The sight of a horse tied to the handrail outside of the building was startling, but with the way that the day was going, it wasn't nearly the oddest thing that had happened. Kaleb and Kara took a few moments to dump the purple dust that used to be Malorie Cyprus into the bushes and then followed the rest of the group into the building, checking to make sure that everyone avoided the present that the horse had left inside the building; most likely the reason it was now tethered outside.

The backstage area was set up the way the boys liked, a snack table stocked with their favorites sitting front and center. Jacob didn't hesitate in grabbing up a couple gummi worms and pretending that they were boogers. Jessica giggled at his antics, while Nelson grabbed a Diet Coke and Kaleb kept walking past the table.

Eventually everyone ended up in the hallway outside the dressing rooms. A tall guy, maybe twenty five stood with his back towards the group. He had almost shoulder length, wavy dark hair and looked to be wearing a skirt. When he spun around, everyone gasped, minus Kara.

"Caspian?" she muttered. "Really? Like, really?"

"That's Your Royal Highness, to you Kara."

"If I hadn't shown up in that stupid Narnia in my closet a year ago, you wouldn't have any lands to rule over," she told him. "And to think that I willingly let those kids take credit for my work," she added under her breath. "How's Aslan?" she wondered.

Caspian shrugged. "Good as ever. The lion suit is getting a bit small so he's thinking of ordering another one. You know a good costume-maker?"

Kara shook her head. Dumbledore had been putting on a bit of weight, though she didn't know how, since he was always from running back and forth between Hogwarts and Narnia. She guessed that Apparating everywhere made you lazy.

Kaleb smiled and took off his hat, reaching into it and producing a card. "He does all our stuff and a bunch of stuff on Broadway."

"Comforting," Caspian muttered, looking the boys over.

They shrugged sheepishly.

"So what did you want?" Kara pressed.

"You."

"Me?"

"We need help. It seems –"

"Look," Kara interrupted him. "My message to you was sent via ignoring Tumnus. I'm sure he told you all about it."

"Actually, Tumnus told me to pick you up here."

"Unicorn turds." He was a sneaky son of a banshee. "Forget it."

"But –"

"No buts. I'm through with that godforsaken land."

"But –"

"And Dumbledore in a lion suit does not count as God. Adios."

Caspian's shoulders fell slightly and moved till he was in front of her. She could see the hurt in his eyes. She rolled hers. He sighed and straightened up, knowing his pity routine was a bust. He gave her a look and then swept out of the hallway.

"So where is this –"

There was strangled cry and suddenly a leg flew into the hallway. The top of it was cauterized and smelled of burning flesh.

"That's him," Nelson murmured.

The manager that appeared was black; but it wasn't a black from African descent black, it was an I'm-encased-in-plastic black. He sounded slightly asthmatic inside his suit.

"My apprentices," he crooned, if such a man speaking through a voice altering device could croon.

"You weren't kidding," Megan said. "How did he end up as your manager?"

"He just kind of seized the position. Made sure there was no competition. You know what I'm saying?" Jacob seemed to like talking in vague terms.

Kara, Megan and Jessica shrugged. "Sure."

"Who are these infiltrators?!" the intimidating plastic man demanded, whipping out a red lightsaber.

"C-calm down," Nelson told him, attempting to mask his fear. "These are our friends."

Jacob laughed and smacked Darth Vader on the back. "They aren't Jedi, for goodness sake!"

Kara swallowed hard and glanced in Ellie's direction. Ellie, who was standing out of Vader's line of sight, drug her finger across her throat and then pretended to die. Kara nodded her head imperceptibly and a doughnut flew from the snack table to hit Ellie. She wiped filling from her hairline and glared at Kara who was now hiding behind Megan. Megan was trembling.

Vader glared at the girls, then at the boys and then at Oliver Wood. "You."

Oliver stepped forward and shrugged. "Me."

"I knew you looked familiar. You have a brother; Luke."

Oliver nodded. "And a sister if you remember correctly."

"Triplets," Vader spat. "Now I remember why I left; I couldn't stand the crying all the time. If it wasn't one of you, it was another. I couldn't get any evil plans carried out because you needed to be changed or fed or clothed…"

"How's grandpa?" Oliver asked.

"The Emperor is fine," Vader responded.

An awkward silence passed. "S-so, you said we had to meet with you?" Kaleb prodded finally.

"Ah yes," Vader said. "I am now the manager of your record label."

"But –"

"Silence!" he roared, holding his hand out in a U-shape.

Kaleb's qualms with the situation were suddenly replaced with a gagging sound.

Kara rolled her eyes and waved her hand, as if swatting off a fly. "Child's play," she muttered.

Vader's grip on Kaleb disappeared and Jacob reached over to grab Kaleb before he fell over. There was a pop from the leg laying on the ground as a blister burst on it, and the smell of burning flesh hit everyone's noses, minus the one under Vader's mask. Suddenly everyone knew; that was their former manager.

Jessica let a gasp slip out and then a giggle in the awkward silence.

Everybody else chuckled uneasily.

The situation was finally resolved by a techie running over and bowing before Darth Vader.

"Your Highness, the sound boards are ready and the microphones are set up; we are ready for rehearsal."

Vader grunted and breathed in and out for a second before waving his massive hand at the band. Jacob, Kaleb and Nelson slipped out of the hallway, staying as far away from Vader as possible. When they were gone, Vader swept out to follow them.

The band practiced and practiced and practiced. It was an hour before the show started when Vader finally called it quits.

"I thought we sounded good the first time around," Jacob rasped to Kaleb.

Kaleb shook his head as his left hand's fingertips were immersed in ice.

Nelson had his hand around his throat and it looked like his face was turning red.

"I thought we didn't need the six and a half hours of practice," Kaleb said, his voice still okay only because Vader had forbidden him from singing after the first hour of practice.

Nelson was waving his arms madly now, trying to attract anyone's attention. His face was a deep shade of scarlet, slowly fading into a purple color.

"What did you think, Nelson?"

Kaleb checked his blistered fingers and Jacob was searching for throat lozenges. When Nelson didn't respond, Kaleb looked up.

"Nelson, dude, breathe; you're turning blue."

Nelson pointed at his throat and then wrapped his hands around it.

"Oh my Aslan!" Jessica screamed, sitting up from where she was napping on the floor of backstage with Kara and Megan.

Nelson's eyes bugged as he thought that help was on its way. He looked thoroughly desperate as Jessica slumped back over and continued to snore. Jacob had turned to see who had screamed and caught sight of Nelson's now bright blue face. He studied him for a moment, scratched his head and then returned to shoving throat lozenges in his mouth.

Megan opened her eyes as Nelson fell out of his chair and passed out unconscious on the floor. She rushed over to where he had fallen, letting Kara's head hit the floor with a resounding thump, and bent over his limp figure. She laid her head on his chest, trying to see if he had a heart beat or not. Kara stood up and joined Megan where she still had her head on his chest. Her face was smiling despite the fact that Nelson had no pulse.

Kara shoved Megan off his body and was about to put her lips to his when she realized his face was blue. Megan shoved Kara away and put her lips to Nelson's. Kara pushed her face away, pulled Nelson's head back and stuck her finger into his mouth, scrunching her face up in disgust as she did so.

By that time, Jessica had come to and Jacob and Kaleb were all gathered around, watching. Kara felt something lodged in the back of his throat and managed to dislodge it. She tossed the Lego at Jacob and then allowed Megan to start the mouth to mouth. It only took her two breaths to bring him back.

"Oh! My Lego!" Jacob exclaimed, finally realizing what had been tossed his way.

Kaleb smacked the back of Jacob's head. "He could have died! How many times have I told you not to put your Legos in the Jello?"

"Thirty-six," Nelson answered.

Jacob looked like he didn't believe him and then began to count on his fingers.

Kaleb helped Nelson up and helped him brush off.

Nelson swatted away Kaleb's hand. "You almost let me die!"

Kaleb shrugged. "How was I supposed to know you needed saving?"

Nelson's eyes bugged out again. "From the international symbol for choking!!" Nelson yelled, wrapping his hands around his throat. "That's what this motion means!!"

"I knew I learned that correctly," Kaleb muttered. "Who would have thought that health class would come in handy at all?"

Nelson threw up his hands and stomped off with Megan trailing behind.

"Can I borrow your fingers?" Jacob asked Jessica, still counting away.

Jessica smiled and obliged. Kara and Ellie exchanged looks. Kara rolled her eyes; Ellie grinned. Kaleb seemed confused.

Vader chose that moment to stomp onto the scene, also stomping on Oliver's fingers; Oliver was still passed out near the drum set. When Vader's heel came down on his fingers, he yelped and jumped up, cradling his broken fingers in his good hand.

"What the –"

His exclamation was cut short by Ellie's interference. He kept his mouth moving, but nothing was coming out. Vader ignored him, where he was now jumping around and pointing, waving his finger in mad motions and then searching for his wand, which Kara could see was protruding from Ellie's pocket.

"Just for safe-keeping," she murmured, watching Oliver's silent tirade.

With Vader's sudden appearance, things went immediately back to businesslike. The brothers went back to their assigned positions and the girls and Oliver scrambled back to the sidelines. Oliver had regained his voice, thanks in large part to Ellie, and he demanded to know where she put his wand. She handed it back to him and he healed his hand before summoning his broom and climbing aboard.

"I'll see you back at school," he told her. "And don't think that Dumbledore won't hear about this."

Ellie stuck her tongue out at him and he glared then soared out of the arena.

"He'll be back at my window tonight, wanting to take me on a moonlight ride through the Forbidden Forest," she told Kara as Kara watched him go.

"Must be a common occurrence."

Ellie shrugged. "More or less."

Megan had returned from where she was talking sense back into Nelson. Her phone went off as the boys started their first song for the fifty sixth time. She answered, her face fell and after much pleading, she hung up.

"It's time for us to go," she said. "Mom wants us home."

Jessica's face fell harder than Megan's. "Okay," she muttered disappointedly.

Kara shrugged.

They waited till the end of the song then said goodbye to the brothers. Numbers were exchanged and so were kisses; mainly between Nelson and Megan. Jessica and Jacob were too busy trying to pick up where they had left off counting. Kaleb and Kara said goodbye and just as he leaned in to kiss her, her eyes focused on someone in the distance. Her mouth fell open and Kaleb's lips hit her teeth.

"PAULY!!" she hollered, shoving her way around Kaleb and barreling towards the 6' 4" swimming star.

Martin Paulson looked startled at such a greeting, and even more confused as he realized he had gotten bad directions to the natatorium. Kara collided with Martin, wrapping her arms around him. He seemed uneasy and then looked down. He smiled.

"Hi, I'm Martin."

"I'm Kara; want to get married?" she asked, looking up at him with her chin on his sternum.

His grin widened. "I've been waiting for an eighteen year old girl to throw herself at me and ask to get married. Sure!"

Kara's eyes glazed over as she stared at him stupidly.

"Do you know where the natatorium is by chance?" he asked.

She nodded.

"Well let's go." He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and they headed towards the building's exit.

It was too late when the others realized she was gone. Ellie looked disgruntled, but not surprised. Megan was too busy reminiscing about Nelson to worry about their ride home, and Jessica had confused herself by skipping the number 25 and was now trying to backtrack and figure out where she went wrong in her counting. Ellie pulled out her wand and was about to summon another form of transportation when a Silver Volvo pulled up.

"Need a ride?" A silken voice came from the car.

Ellie nodded and rolled her eyes. Of course her great aunt Alice would know that they needed a ride and send her grandfather. The others climbed into the car and Edward zoomed off towards their respective homes.


End file.
